Comments on: It Didn’t Speak in Words

By: Dave

Dave — Mon, 23 Jul 2007 00:05:53 +0000

Jarrett – Would they seem that way to a native speaker of Spanish, though? I don’t know.

Thanks for the comment.

By: Jarrett

Jarrett — Sun, 22 Jul 2007 10:55:46 +0000

Until I saw that Bill had nailed it before me, I was going to comment that in both music and texture, the English seems brighter, calmer, less congested than the Spanish original. Maybe that’s mostly because the “cuya” clauses in Spanish turn into simpler English forms.

I’d be interested to see a Spanish translation of your version.

Cheers, J

By: Dave

Dave — Thu, 19 Jul 2007 23:16:32 +0000

Bill – Thanks for the appreciative and analytical comments. I’ve been away from the computer all day, so didn’t get a chance to respond earlier, but fortunately you are an able monologist! :)

By: Bill

Bill — Thu, 19 Jul 2007 00:19:20 +0000

O.K. The Spanish ain’t clunky, just that that final sentence is a little more winding than your translation.

What a task you had before you to make do without “nubes”, “cuerpo”, “sombras”. That whole line: “Una mirada fugaz entre las sombras.”

By: Bill

Bill — Thu, 19 Jul 2007 00:10:30 +0000

But no equivalence. Right.

I’m enjoying this, Dave. Thanks.

Should “repuesta” be spelled “respuesta”?

I think your translation of “Porque el deseo es una pregunta cuya repuesta nadie sabe” to be elegant! I’m not one to have much of a sensibility of the feel and heft of the syllables in the Spanish, but to me it is all elbows and knees in comparison with your joint-less-ness. I just know I like what you’ve done; it is fluent. The “half with half” portion slays me! I think of something nearly liquid like a split avocado, half lain on half, put back together. I can’t think when I’ve seen the word “half” put to use with a cleaner slice!

By: Bill

Bill — Wed, 18 Jul 2007 19:15:20 +0000

Goodness knows there’s an answer!