Comments on: The Dog https://www.vianegativa.us/2007/03/the-dog/ Purveyors of fine poetry since 2003. Sat, 14 May 2016 16:11:26 +0000 hourly 1 By: Dave https://www.vianegativa.us/2007/03/the-dog/#comment-4101 Mon, 02 Apr 2007 14:18:40 +0000 http://www.vianegativa.us/2007/03/29/the-dog/#comment-4101 MichelleL – Oh, I see — you just left out the “blogspot” part of the URL.

It’ll get easier pretty soon. (Except for the writing part. If that gets easier, you’re probably taking short-cuts!)

marly – :)

Ivy – Thanks for stopping by. I’m honored, as always.

Teju – Thanks for leaving the link.

]]> By: Teju https://www.vianegativa.us/2007/03/the-dog/#comment-4100 Mon, 02 Apr 2007 13:24:03 +0000 http://www.vianegativa.us/2007/03/29/the-dog/#comment-4100 Coincidentally…

]]> By: Ivy https://www.vianegativa.us/2007/03/the-dog/#comment-4099 Sun, 01 Apr 2007 22:14:25 +0000 http://www.vianegativa.us/2007/03/29/the-dog/#comment-4099 Captured the melancholic atmosphere of this painting and very evocative for me — thanks for writing it!

]]> By: marly https://www.vianegativa.us/2007/03/the-dog/#comment-4098 Sun, 01 Apr 2007 19:47:40 +0000 http://www.vianegativa.us/2007/03/29/the-dog/#comment-4098 Like that thrown stick!

I met a dog in the elevator five minutes ago, and he told me that his master was Goya and that he tasted like bone.

5 minutes ago.

April Fool’s. No kidding.

]]> By: David Harmon https://www.vianegativa.us/2007/03/the-dog/#comment-4097 Sat, 31 Mar 2007 18:36:50 +0000 http://www.vianegativa.us/2007/03/29/the-dog/#comment-4097 Musings on the problem line et seq:

He hasn’t come home in ages…

his fading scents drift around,
until the house smells like a thrown stick

without him, his scent fades,
the rake smells like a thrown stick

]]> By: MichelleL https://www.vianegativa.us/2007/03/the-dog/#comment-4096 Sat, 31 Mar 2007 16:42:48 +0000 http://www.vianegativa.us/2007/03/29/the-dog/#comment-4096 I’m glad the suggestions were helpful. Sorry about the link, this is only my second week and I’m still getting the hang of how all of this works.

]]> By: Dave https://www.vianegativa.us/2007/03/the-dog/#comment-4095 Sat, 31 Mar 2007 10:36:29 +0000 http://www.vianegativa.us/2007/03/29/the-dog/#comment-4095 Those are good suggestions, Michelle – especially the first. I’ll try thinking along those lines and see if I can come up with something. Thanks!

(By the way, your link doesn’t work.)

]]> By: MichelleL https://www.vianegativa.us/2007/03/the-dog/#comment-4094 Sat, 31 Mar 2007 04:23:34 +0000 http://www.vianegativa.us/2007/03/29/the-dog/#comment-4094 How about —

Not down, not up, just gone

Reminds me of commands — which is more “doglike” in my mind.

or maybe . . .

His scent fades fast

To evoke the dog’s strong sense of smell?

In any case — I like the poem.

]]> By: Dave https://www.vianegativa.us/2007/03/the-dog/#comment-4093 Sat, 31 Mar 2007 01:12:52 +0000 http://www.vianegativa.us/2007/03/29/the-dog/#comment-4093 Hi all – Thanks for the kind comments. David, I think you’re right to finger that line as the weakest link. It doesn’t feel quite fully earned – like a dog would actually think that way.

]]> By: David Harmon https://www.vianegativa.us/2007/03/the-dog/#comment-4092 Fri, 30 Mar 2007 23:51:33 +0000 http://www.vianegativa.us/2007/03/29/the-dog/#comment-4092 Wonderfully sad… and yes, I like the “world without him” couplet too. I dunno about “turned into a bird, I think”, but I can’t come up with anything better. It does give a sense of puzzled helplessness that seems very appropriate.

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