Resolutions

This year, I will:

  • dissolve in solution
  • void the warranty
  • integrate multi-dimensional dynamics to improve performance
  • do the people’s business
  • evolve lungs and learn to live on land
  • keep out of reach of children
  • take calming herbs such as chamomile, stinging nettle, and oatstraw
  • hang crepe on your door
  • drink to that
  • LOL
  • apply a thin layer of the product over affected area twice daily
  • share the wealth
  • walk like a duck
  • declare victory and withdraw all my troops
  • subtract line 40a from line 38
  • become my own cheerleader
  • get on the same page
  • combine medications to enhance depression outcomes
  • drop it like it’s hot
  • use verbs or action words to help define the objective
  • extend my wardrobe to patterned suits including pinstripes, herringbone, and plaids
  • shuffle off to Buffalo
  • scheme