Exotica

In the all-night grocery store            between the local

farmer’s market produce table      and rows of greens

prewashed and packaged         in plastic a few shelves

with fruit from those other          worlds: gold skinned

red-bristled and starred                     sheathed in husks

or pinched and bruised—                 Once I saw a small

strip of cane, its drying                          sugars and high-

priced geometry tagged for               some compost bin

Who hungers for you                                I wanted to ask

Sometimes small birds                  fly in through sliding

doors and careen                                          in the rafters

uncertain of how                                         they got there

Creature

They wrought in the morning, and I did keep my bed, and my pain continued on me mightily that I kept within all day in great pain, and could break no wind nor have any stool after my physic had done working. So in the evening I took coach and to Mr. Holliard’s, but he was not at home, and so home again, and whether the coach did me good or no I know not, but having a good fire in my chamber, I begun to break six or seven small and great farts; and so to bed and lay in good ease all night, and pissed pretty well in the morning, but no more wind came as it used to to plentifully, after it once begun, nor any inclination to stool.

wrought in bed
I continue working

a fire in the wind
a used tool


Erasure poem derived from The Diary of Samuel Pepys, Wednesday 7 October 1663.

Landfall

There was a game played when we were younger:
one closed her eyes and the other poised

a finger, slowly swirled in the air the shape
of a letter an inch from her forehead.

Is this what they mean when they ask
whether there is a language that exists

before the opening of language? The body’s page
rising to the smallest hint of wind or disturbance,

the agony of not knowing what is there in its
ambit: if blow, if caress, if nothingness.

Killjoy

Slept pretty well, and my wife waked to ring the bell to call up our mayds to the washing about 4 o’clock, and I was and she angry that our bell did not wake them sooner, but I will get a bigger bell. So we to sleep again till 8 o’clock, and then I up in some ease to the office, where we had a full board, where we examined Cocke’s second account, when Mr. Turner had drawn a bill directly to be paid the balance thereof, as Mr. Cocke demanded, and Sir J. Minnes did boldly assert the truth of it, and that he had examined it, when there is no such thing, but many vouchers, upon examination, missing, and we saw reason to strike off several of his demands, and to bring down his 5 per cent. commission to 3 per cent. So we shall save the King some money, which both the Comptroller and his clerke had absolutely given away. There was also two occasions more of difference at the table; the one being to make out a bill to Captain Smith for his salary abroad as commander-in-chief in the Streights. Sir J. Minnes did demand an increase of salary for his being Vice-Admiral in the Downes, he having received but 40s. without an increase, when Sir J. Lawson, in the same voyage, had 3l., and others have also had increase, only he, because he was an officer of the board, was worse used than any body else, and particularly told Sir W. Batten that he was the opposer formerly of his having an increase, which I did wonder to hear him so boldly lay it to him. So we hushed up the dispute, and offered, if he would, to examine precedents, and report them, if there was any thing to his advantage to be found, to the Duke.
The next was, Mr. Chr. Pett and Deane were summoned to give an account of some knees which Pett reported bad, that were to be served in by Sir W. Warren, we having contracted that none should be served but such as were to be approved of by our officers. So that if they were bad they were to be blamed for receiving them. Thence we fell to talk of Warren’s other goods, which Pett had said were generally bad, and falling to this contract again, I did say it was the most cautious and as good a contract as had been made here, and the only [one] that had been in such terms. Sir J. Minnes told me angrily that Winter’s timber, bought for 33s. per load, was as good and in the same terms. I told him that it was not so, but that he and Sir W. Batten were both abused, and I would prove it was as dear a bargain as had been made this half year, which occasioned high words between them and me, but I am able to prove it and will. That also was so ended, and so to other business.
At noon Lewellin coming to me I took him and Deane, and there met my uncle Thomas, and we dined together, but was vexed that, it being washing-day, we had no meat dressed, but sent to the Cook’s, and my people had so little witt to send in our meat from abroad in that Cook’s dishes, which were marked with the name of the Cook upon them, by which, if they observed anything, they might know it was not my own dinner.
After dinner we broke up, and I by coach, setting down Luellin in Cheapside. So to White Hall, where at the Committee of Tangier, but, Lord! how I was troubled to see my Lord Tiviott’s accounts of 10,000l. paid in that manner, and wish 1000 times I had not been there.
Thence rose with Sir G. Carteret and to his lodgings, and there discoursed of our frays at the table to-day, and particularly of that of the contract, and the contract of masts the other day, declaring my fair dealing, and so needing not any man’s good report of it, or word for it, and that I would make it so appear to him, if he desired it, which he did, and I will do it.
Thence home by water in great pain, and at my office a while, and thence a little to Sir W. Pen, and so home to bed, and finding myself beginning to be troubled with wind as I used to be, and in pain in making water, I took a couple of pills that I had by me of Mr. Hollyard’s.

I am a missing man
a captain without a voyage

I oppose wonder so old a hush
and offer to fell all the winter’s timber

declaring my need for ice
and wind and pain


Erasure poem derived from The Diary of Samuel Pepys, Tuesday 6 October 1663.

User

Up with pain, and with Sir J. Minnes by coach to the Temple, and then I to my brother’s, and up and down on business, and so to the New Exchange, and there met Creed, and he and I walked two or three hours, talking of many businesses, especially about Tangier, and my Lord Tiviot’s bringing in of high accounts, and yet if they were higher are like to pass without exception, and then of my Lord Sandwich sending a messenger to know whether the King intends to come to Newmarket, as is talked, that he may be ready to entertain him at Hinchingbroke.
Thence home and dined, and my wife all day putting up her hangings in her closett, which she do very prettily herself with her own hand, to my great content. So I to the office till night, about several businesses, and then went and sat an hour or two with Sir W. Pen, talking very largely of Sir J. Minnes’s simplicity and unsteadiness, and of Sir W. Batten’s suspicious dealings, wherein I was open, and he sufficiently, so that I do not care for his telling of tales, for he said as much, but whether that were so or no I said nothing but what is my certain knowledge and belief concerning him. Thence home to bed in great pain.

high and higher like a messenger
hanging herself with her own hand

an hour or two of simplicity
where I was open and sufficient

do not tell tales
concerning pain


Erasure poem derived from The Diary of Samuel Pepys, Monday 5 October 1663.

Coloring inside the lines

All morning the mist,
the sharp uncertainty
of emerging things—
Space being mostly

a field against which
the body tests
the limits of its
own geography:

and the sheer
exhaustion descending
like a veil, occluding
everything but

the sensation of weight.
The last thing I remember
before I surrendered:
I brought in

a green dish of plants
to shield them
from rain.

Wrung

I have been the girl
given a sack and told
to sort grain from stone.

And I have been the girl
unseated from a horse
whose head was nailed

to the top of the city wall.
I wanted to lie in my cell
and let the rodents eat

my heart out of my chest,
but the bees kept returning,
wanting to be let back

into the womb: they scoured
its walls, taking the last
cache of honey, stirring

the last pool of sulfur
in its depths. In the night,
a bell struck the sound

of its cracking;
it lingered, echo
becoming darkening brass.

 

In response to Via Negativa: No toll.

Monologue

(Lord’s day). Up and to church, my house being miserably overflooded with rayne last night, which makes me almost mad. At home to dinner with my wife, and so to talk, and to church again, and so home, and all the evening most pleasantly passed the time in good discourse of our fortune and family till supper, and so to bed, in some pain below, through cold got.

rain makes a mad din all evening

time is our tune


Erasure poem derived from The Diary of Samuel Pepys, Sunday 4 October 1663.

Distance

“…A long call
and the sudden nothing after” ~ D. Bonta

In summer, hornets took over
a hollowed-out log that birds
once filled with twigs,
discarded tufts, detritus.

Into their nest they buzzed,
blared warnings whenever I came
too close, whenever the spray
from the garden hose fell

in an arc around their cloister.
I could have smoked them
into a stupor, delivered
a toxic fume. But we’ll

keep our distance,
go about our
business— I know
their sting, intuit

that silence and restraint
will serve me better than
insistence: this wish to probe,
clean up, empty out, subdue.

 

In response to Via Negativa: Quiet house.

No toll

Up, being well pleased with my new lodging and the convenience of having our mayds and none else about us, Will lying below. So to the office, and there we sat full of business all the morning. At noon I home to dinner, and then abroad to buy a bell to hang by our chamber door to call the mayds. Then to the office, and met Mr. Blackburne, who came to know the reason of his kinsman (my Will) his being observed by his friends of late to droop much. I told him my great displeasure against him and the reasons of it, to his great trouble yet satisfaction, for my care over him, and how every thing I said was for the good of the fellow, and he will take time to examine the fellow about all, and to desire my pleasure concerning him, which I told him was either that he should become a better servant or that we would not have him under my roof to be a trouble. He tells me in a few days he will come to me again and we shall agree what to do therein. I home and told my wife all, and am troubled to see that my servants and others should be the greatest trouble I have in the world, more than for myself. We then to set up our bell with a smith very well, and then I late at the office. So home to supper and to bed.

full of morning
the bell by our door

who am I to droop
if others should trouble
the world more than me


Erasure poem derived from The Diary of Samuel Pepys, Saturday 3 October 1663.