Reaction

Upon a letter this morning from Mr. Moore, I went to my cozen Turner’s chamber, and there put him drawing a replication to Tom Trice’s answer speedily. So to Whitehall and there met Mr. Moore, and I walked long in Westminster Hall, and thence with him to the Wardrobe to dinner, where dined Mrs. Sanderson, the mother of the maids, and after dinner my Lady and she and I on foot to Pater Noster Row to buy a petticoat against the Queen’s coming for my Lady, of plain satin, and other things; and being come back again, we there met Mr. Nathaniel Crew at the Wardrobe with a young gentleman, a friend and fellow student of his, and of a good family, Mr. Knightly, and known to the Crews, of whom my Lady privately told me she hath some thoughts of a match for my Lady Jemimah. I like the person very well, and he hath 2000l. per annum. Thence to the office, and there we sat, and thence after writing letters to all my friends with my Lord at Portsmouth, I walked to my brother Tom’s to see a velvet cloak, which I buy of Mr. Moore. It will cost me 8l. 10s.; he bought it for 6l. 10s., but it is worth my money. So home and find all things made clean against to-morrow, which pleases me well. So to bed.

Raw, I answer with war:
another foot coming
for another me

in the night, my private match
like a mouth made clean
against tomorrow.


Erasure poem derived from The Diary of Samuel Pepys, Saturday 17 May 1662.

Eidos

Who ate my hunger and in eating
filled it? And who drank my punishing
thirst, then called up to air my mutest
songs? I did not know you then except
as the ache that ticked at my wrists,
as light that burned long after I
closed my lids. Long-fingered,
your shadow returns; and with one
move, locked gates surrender.

 

In response to Via Negativa: The Other (El Otro) ....

The Other (El Otro) by Rosario Castellanos

This entry is part 1 of 38 in the series Poetry from the Other Americas

 

Why say the names of gods, stars,
spray from an invisible ocean
or pollen from the farthest gardens?
If life hurts us, if every day comes
tearing at our innards, if every night falls
convulsing, murdered.
If someone else’s pain hurts us—a man
we don’t know, but who is
here at all hours, is victim
and enemy and love and everything
that’s missing if we want to be whole.
Never say that darkness is your lot;
don’t swallow joy in one gulp.
Look around you: there’s the other, always there’s the other.
He breathes whatever suffocates you,
your hunger is what he eats.
He dies with the purer portion of your death.

translation of “El Otro“:

¿Por qué decir nombres de dioses, astros,
espumas de un océano invisible,
polen de los jardines más remotos?
Si nos duele la vida, si cada día llega
desgarrando la entraña, si cada noche cae
convulsa, asesinada.
Si nos duele el dolor en alguien, en un hombre
al que no conocemos, pero está
presente a todas horas y es la víctima
y el enemigo y el amor y todo
lo que nos falta para ser enteros.
Nunca digas que es tuya la tiniebla,
no te bebas de un sorbo la alegría.
Mira a tu alrededor: hay otro, siempre hay otro.
Lo que él respira es lo que a ti te asfixia,
lo que come es tu hambre.
Muere con la mitad más pura de tu muerte.

cover of "Poesía no eres tú: obra poética, 1948-1971"This poem by the Mexican poet and fiction writer Rosario Castellanos (whom you can hear reading it at PalabraVirtual.com) seemed a fitting way to inaugurate a new, weekly series here at Via Negativa, “Poetry from the Other Americas.” I’ve always been irritated by the provincial focus of the poetry establishment in the United States, where most prizes are for U.S. residents only and where poetry in translation gets scant notice from reviewers, critics, and readers of poetry—to say nothing of the arrogance of continuing to refer to the U.S. as “America.” There is much more to American poetry than what’s written in the United States… but even the great Puerto Rican poets such as Luis Palés Matos and Julia de Burgos don’t get included in the standard anthologies of “American” verse, to say nothing of Chicano poets who may write in both English and Spanish. Are we to suppose that the editors of these anthologies are “English-only” bigots? And we’re missing out on so much great poetry!

So I’m launching this series to help expand readers’ horizons—and my own. I don’t know this literature nearly as well as I should, and my translation muscles need a work-out, too, so this is very much a learn-by-doing kind of exercise. I welcome criticism from friends with a better command of Spanish (mine is quite shaky). I don’t know Portuguese, French, or any of the indigenous languages of the Americas, but perhaps I’ll be able to convince a few other translators to contribute to the series, or simply share bilingual videopoems if I can find them. Do get in touch if you’d like to help out. I’m grateful to Jean Morris and Christine Swint for their help with this one on Facebook.

For more on Rosario Castellanos, her struggles as a woman writer and the darkness of her poetry, I recommend this essay by Lucina Kathmann in Cordite Poetry Review: “The Woman Who Knows Latin.”

Abyssopelagic

Blue fantasy of otherworldly life
and death, there are creatures gliding
in your deepest corridors who have escaped
our great obsession with the catalogue—
They do not miss us. They have no need
for nomenclature and derivatives,
nor gestures of display. Imagine
hearts more exemplary than probes,
perforating the murky dark.

 

In response to Via Negativa: The unknown sea.

Finished

Up early, Mr. Hater and I to the office, and there I made an end of my book of contracts which I have been making an abstract of. Dined at home, and spent most of the day at the office. At night to supper and bed.

A hat to
the office here,
I end my contract,
making an abstract home of the night.


Erasure poem derived from The Diary of Samuel Pepys, Friday 16 May 1662.

The unknown sea

To Westminster; and at the Privy Seal I saw Mr. Coventry’s seal for his being Commissioner with us, at which I know not yet whether to be glad or otherwise. So doing several things by the way, I walked home, and after dinner to the office all the afternoon. At night, all the bells of the town rung, and bonfires made for the joy of the Queen’s arrival, who came and landed at Portsmouth last night. But I do not see much thorough joy, but only an indifferent one, in the hearts of people, who are much discontented at the pride and luxury of the Court, and running in debt.

The sea I miss
I know not:
the otherwise things,
the way of ice,
all the bells and bonfires,
the land at night.
I do not see much:
only an indifferent heart.


Erasure poem derived from The Diary of Samuel Pepys, Thursday 15 May 1662.

Of human bondage

All the morning at Westminster and elsewhere about business, and dined at the Wardrobe; and after dinner, sat talking an hour or two alone with my Lady. She is afeard that my Lady Castlemaine will keep still with the King, and I am afeard she will not, for I love her well. Thence to my brother’s, and finding him in a lie about the lining of my new morning gown, saying that it was the same with the outside, I was very angry with him and parted so. So home after an hour stay at Paul’s Churchyard, and there came Mr. Morelock of Chatham, and brought me a stately cake, and I perceive he has done the same to the rest, of which I was glad; so to bed.

Alone, he is a castle keep,
still with fear:

will love find him
in a lie, saying

that it was the same outside
as with a lock and a state…


Erasure poem derived from The Diary of Samuel Pepys, Wednesday 14 May 1662.

What I didn’t know then (though later I found out I secretly knew anyway)

And there is a moment
eating bread and butter
on the Mekong River
when I taste the butter.
~ Ellen Bass, “Boat, Vietnam”

You will have to order
a separate filing cabinet for program files.
A filing cabinet does not work like Hermione Granger’s purse.
Sorting files is mostly a joke.
In this well-defined space, the universe is filled with daily chaos
you will come to expect and embrace, if not necessarily love.
At regular intervals you will join in with others
in the general complaints about the perennial scarcity
of resources and the expectation to creatively do more
with less; or about the clumsy/outdated/unbeautiful
webpage templates that do absolutely nothing to represent
the critical and artistic edge, the stunning originality
and vitality of your faculty’s and students’ research interests.
And it will all feel oddly familiar, like call and response in church.
You will develop an extensive email directory tree
with folders sprouting from all its branches.
You will congratulate yourself on achieving some minor success
in this department until the day central
computing services announces that all archived material
prior to a certain date will disappear.
It takes an entire first term (or three years) of service
to decide you will not read work emails on weekends.
You tell yourself you are not an emergency room doctor.
Which for the most part makes for a convincing script.
There is still going to be the occasional temptation to peek.
Which is the moment you know you are doomed.
Mondays will be hell.
They are always hell anyway.
You will learn what it’s like, dealing with hell.
There’s just no way around it but through it.
You also find out you have actually become
passably good at dealing with hell.
Except perhaps for that piece of hell called
faculty course scheduling, when everyone
wants the sweet spot and no one wants to teach
at 8 in the morning or from 7 to 10 at night.
The people on the ninth floor are your friends.
Depending on the time of year, your level of stress,
or the number of your committee assignments,
the people on the ninth floor are not your friends.
The people on the ninth floor are your colleagues.
The people “up the chain” are sometimes referred
to in collective third person.
The people “up the chain” will appear in group emails
and it will perhaps make you feel like you are in a secret club.
There is a handbook.
There is a staff and employee handbook.
There is a student handbook.
(Oh my god is there a student handbook? Did you all forget
to write a student handbook?)
Yes there is a timeline.
There are several timelines, but there is no clock in the lobby
or in the hallways near the elevators which can be counted on
to break down once or twice a month.
There is an orientation.
There are several orientations including this one.
There are helpful orientations and there are
orientations that are meh.
It will become part of your job to help give feedback
so that there are hopefully more of the former than the latter.
There are acronyms. Consensus is a value and not an acronym.
There are acronyms for all our special procedures.
Did you WEAVE yet? Are we getting SACed? Have you
encouraged your students to PFF at least once?
And there are reports. Did someone mention reports?
There are reports submitted after reports.
There are short reports and long reports.
There are annual Peterson’s surveys that will require
deployment of basic arithmetic procedures across a small grid.
There are internal and external program reviews
and the first time you hear the Associate Dean refer to these
exercises as self-studies, you look around to check
if there might be a yoga mat or meditation cushion in the room.
But above all things, you are here for your students.
You know they are so talented and that they do so much.
You would unreservedly sing their praises
except perhaps when they drag their heels completing and submitting forms
or registering for the required 9 credit hours per semester on time,
which generates a memo from the office of the Associate Dean. Or when,
despite advising on prerequisites, they take the dubious road
less traveled by, which gets them in one kind of administrative
conflict or another. They are fine for the most part
except perhaps for that one time they barge into your office
in a meltdown, weeping and screaming, demanding
the assistantship they deserve after coming into the program
despite not having been awarded funding; and you wait patiently
and calm them down, offer a tissue, and print a link through which
possible work opportunities on campus might be explored.
To reiterate: you are here for your students.
And it gives you great joy to announce their triumphs
and successes in Tweet-worthy and Facebookable moments—
Because you know that social networking is now a vital aspect
of program life and administration directly connected
to program marketing and promotion, especially if you do not have
the big budget bucks to buy full page color ads even once a year
in your discipline’s hallmark publications. It is wonderful
to follow the careers of alumni who have gone on to earn
doctoral degrees, published books, won important fellowships
and book prizes, and landed on the New York Times’
bestseller lists. It is wonderful to see that the glow
radiating from Commencement group selfies is not merely
the effect of Instagram filters, but from that real,
old-fashioned pride in one’s accomplishments.

Refrain

At the office all morning. Dined at home alone, my wife being sick of her Mois in bed. Then to walk to Pauls churchyard, and there evened all reckonings to this day. So back to the office and so home. And Will Joyce came with a friend, a Cosen of his, to see me and I made them drink a bottle of wine; and so to sing and read and to bed.

At the office
or at home,
if reckoning day came
in a bottle…
I sing.


Erasure poem derived from The Diary of Samuel Pepys, Tuesday 13 May 1662.