Asking for a Friend


I'm only asking for someone
who wants to know: how soon

after you wake up is it acceptable
to take a nap? Can you take personal

days off if you are unemployed? If
you forge the signature of a close

relative on a check, does that count
as a real crime? If your stepmother

has developed such a fear of dying,
is it cool to suggest she might

benefit from swapping her bed for
a satin-lined coffin? And is it ok to tell

her ill-mannered children they'll never
amount to anything anyway, as proven

by the ugly knobs of shoulder blades
where there could've been angel wings?

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