Memory of Brownout With Aborted EEG

When our oldest daughter had seizures at around 
seventeen months, none of the doctors in our city
             could explain them: afebrile, unconnected to any 
fall or blunt force trauma, etc. We were advised to travel
six hours to the capital to visit a leading nuerologist, 
             who ordered an electroencephalogram 
on the spot. In the basement of a hospital that was 
a garrison during the last world war, we tried to keep 
              our crying, struggling child calm as nurses 
and technicians tried to attach a network
of electrodes to her sweaty scalp. Dose 
             after dose of Benadryl and still
she couldn't be still. But as they put the last
wire in place, the heavy drone of machines
             shutting down, followed by the flicker-shut 
of all electricals, then the choke-cough of generators
trying to come to life. Perhaps this was a sign?
             We gathered her up and said No more.
On the long car ride back to the mountains,
she fell into a sleep without a tremor, without
              a sigh. The thing is, until today, no one  
is sure of what any of it meant, or means.

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