Do you remember when everything still seemed possible—when a small vacation to someplace with wide skies and sunlight bouncing off white sand and the white walls of a village felt within reach; when paying for contingencies didn't break the bank; when starting over didn't feel like privilege or just another chance to make the same mistakes, but simply the universe finally recognizing it was willing to give you the break it should have given you all those years ago? Toward the end of the year, towns along the Rhine set up fairy lights and Christmas markets, and the cruise ships let out passengers from other worlds— They walk amid tables groaning with gingerbread, jaunty tin soldiers, red-vested nutcrackers and glass ornaments. Can you imagine the clove- scented air and the cold, everyone's frosted breath the thinnest tinsel threading the air? Once, you held a snow globe and shook it to watch the little storms of dust and sparkle trapped under glass: how they cycloned around a miniature house whose inhabitants, if any, would never dream of evacuating to a safer port.
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