I hear you. That last line was an impulsive last-minute addition, prompted in part by my discomfort with poems that end in questions. The result is a poem that’s a bit more obvious than I prefer, either in my own work or in others’. But as you say, obviousness and repetition aren’t bad things if you don’t have the text in front of you. Ever buy a chapbook from a slam poet after a performance, take it home, read it the next day and wonder what the hell seemed so compelling about it? There’s a lot that doesn’t make the transition from voice to page.