Fearmongers

Up, and had my last night’s letters brought back to me, which troubles me, because of my accounts, lest they should be asked for before they come, which I abhorr, being more ready to give than they can be to demand them: so I sent away an expresse to Oxford with them, and another to Portsmouth, with a copy of my letter to Mr. Coventry about my victualling business, for fear he should be gone from Oxford, as he intended, thither. So busy all the morning and at noon to Cocke, and dined there. He and I alone, vexed that we are not rid of all our trouble about our goods, but it is almost over, and in the afternoon to my lodging, and there spent the whole afternoon and evening with Mr. Hater, discoursing of the business of the office, where he tells me that among others Thomas Willson do now and then seem to hint that I do take too much business upon me, more than I can do, and that therefore some do lie undone. This I confess to my trouble is true, but it arises from my being forced to take so much on me, more than is my proper task to undertake. But for this at last I did advise to him to take another clerk if he thinks fit, I will take care to have him paid. I discoursed also much with him about persons fit to be put into the victualling business, and such as I could spare something out of their salaries for them, but without trouble I cannot, I see, well do it, because Thomas Willson must have the refusal of the best place which is London of 200l. per annum, which I did intend for Tooker, and to get 50l. out of it as a help to Mr. Hater. How[ever], I will try to do something of this kind for them.
Having done discourse with him late, I to enter my Tangier accounts fair, and so to supper and to bed.

last night brought back
in the mouth of my fear

we are not rid of our trouble
our whole hate business

where a lie is true
it is so much rope


Erasure poem derived from The Diary of Samuel Pepys, Friday 20 October 1665.

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