Find a tree willing to trade some oxygen for your carbon dioxide.
Start with one breath and see how it goes.
Vacuum cleaners make excellent coaches, since they have nothing useful to teach.
Sleep with your mouth closed so your breath can’t escape.
Cover your mouth when you yawn for the same reason.
Every breath is really the same breath, like a guest that keeps coming back.
Some people do other things while they breathe, but we don’t recommend this. Concentrate!
Public air may be free, but who knows who’s used it?
Breathe natural, odorless bottled air instead.
Some religious people may tell you that prayer is the original form of breathing, but they have it backwards.
Cold weather causes insanity—that’s why you see your breath at lower temperatures.
If pneumonia strikes, burrow into the leaf duff and practice breathing through your skin like a lungless salamander.
The lungs are nothing but wings that have lost their way.